Right Responses & Precipitating Causes

Philippians 2:3-4

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

We have spent the last week (or four) correcting (teaching) reactionary behaviors of our children. When it comes to interacting with others, we know that we are still held accountable for having right responses while not being influenced by precipitating causes.

This is hard stuff! It is hard because it happens all the time. There are things said and done around us and to us all the time that can motivate us toward sin if we are not careful to have a right response.

What does this mean? Here's a snippet of our real-life to give an example. When Child A has a precipitating cause and Child B has the opportunity to respond in conceit, God's Word exhorts us to respond instead in humility, looking to the interests of others and having a right response. It might have looked something like this in our home earlier this week:

• Child A to Child B: Your breath stinks! (This was said as a rather mean and inciting statement. Child B now has a choice to make, either respond in conceit or humility.)
• Child B in response: You always say that to me! I think you are the one with the problem, a smelling problem! (Choosing conceit as a response instead of humility. Bummer.)
• Child A: You should brush your teeth.
• Child B: It's not my problem so I'm not going to brush my teeth.
• Mom to both children, attempting to end argument: Your attitudes both stink! (Obviously not demonstrating a right response when the precipitating cause was arguing children!)

In teaching our children, I often see that my own reaction to their behaviors are not God-honoring and I need correction in my own heart in order to consider their interests first. In the example above, Mom to Child A and Child B (that would be me!) took a few minutes to pray and then passed out the spearmint gum all around, apologized for her ugly example of giving a wrong response to a precipitating cause, and worked through a lesson in giving a right (humble, grace-filled, and patient) response to someone else's unkind words, and considering others interests.

A lesson in social skills regarding bad breath also followed.