Colossians 3:16-17Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.'Tis So Sweet to Trust in JesusText: Louisa M. R. SteadMusic: William J. Kirkpatrick'Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,Just to take Him at his word,Just to rest upon His promise,Just to know "Thus saith the Lord."Jesus, Jesus how I trust Him!How I've proved him o're and o're!Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!O for grace to trust Him more!Yes 'tis sweet to trust in Jesus,Just from sin and self to cease,Just from Jesus simply takingLife and rest and joy and peace.Jesus, Jesus how I trust Him!How I've proved him o're and o're!Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!O for grace to trust Him more!
Early on when we returned home with our older children and things were very much harder than they are now, I would wake up each morning with a terrible, panicked feeling. It was that giant of fear that I faced. It was a flood of terror of being overwhelmed by what I knew I would face again that day, and not wanting to go through all over. I would lay in bed and silently cry and pray. Eventually I would get up and find comfort in God's Word for the morning. There has never been a time in my life when God's Word has been more precious, more sweet to me, than in the past two years when trials have been the most challenging.
I am learning daily about what our children need, how our family functions best, and how God's Word equips us. Sometimes this is by trial and error, though I like to try to prevent the errors (which lead to meltdowns) if possible.
I have learned that our family does not function well with many events on our schedule. The simpler, quieter, and more focused we keep our days the better. I find that a one event/outing per day rule helps everyone, even me. This ends up meaning the exclusion of many other good and wonderful options. I continue to find myself letting go of this ideal (or idol) of parenting/children that looked like the picture the American Dream (and even the Christian Parenting Dream) paints: active, busy children and families who thrive being on the go and well educated. To be honest, some days we are still just working on thriving at home. And some days we are working on not being angry, resentful, and fearful at home. These are big lessons that need to come before all the wonderful programs and opportunities the world (and even the church) offers us.
For some reason this week had a few more "opportunities" than normal: a couple dentist visits, a rare play date, another sick child, a trip to the emergency dentist, a retirement party for my mom in central MN, a glitch with the clocks where we lost an hour. We had to choose carefully how to manage our time. Sadly, we opted to send cards instead of attending the retirement party. And it is best for our entire family that way. Dentist appointments, sick children, daylight savings time and that emergency dental trip were all non-negotiables, so we just had to work our way through them.
In the midst of the busy week I found myself waking even earlier with those same panicked feeling again, wondering how we would get through our days, how I could help one of the kiddos to keep from melting down or getting overstimulated, trying to be well-prepared, but never being prepared enough for things to run smoothly. Even while typing this a temptation to be overwhelmed rises up.
We have been singing several favorite songs each morning during our Bible and worship time and one of them is 'Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus. The words above (verses 1 and 3), so powerful, speak plainly to my heart about trusting Jesus, ceasing from self (worry, doubt, fear!), finding all I need in Him (life, rest, joy, peace), and asking for grace to trust Him more. It is sweetness to be able to trust in Jesus when trials overwhelm us. It is my prayer today that I would have grace to trust Him and that sweetness in trusting Him would overwhelm us in place of exhaustion or fear.
2 comments:
Hi Megan,
I just wanted to encourage you about feeling like you can't keep up with some ideal of enthusiastic business. I am sure some families do that just fine, but I am homeschooling 4 attached, neuro-typical kids, and I have learned that if we don't spend most of our day/week at home, not only does school not get done (the meaningful school, not the worksheets), and my work around the house does not get done, but everyone is more tired and wired and high-strung. So while the kids might be really eager to get out of the house and go on adventures, and while I have gotten a little bit of guilt from other homeschool moms for keeping my kids home more than they think I should, I know being at home is the best choice. I am not just being lazy by staying home--I am being protective of our family's time and energy (emotional and mental too).
Please do not listen to anyone who tells you being out and about is the ideal. It is not. I think it is just as bad for a family to be out too much than to be out too little, so it is up to the parents of each family unit to assess their kids' needs and go from there.
The way you describe your purposefully peace-structured days (to counter the not so peaceful kids, I imagine!) has inspired me, and I wish I was doing things more like you. IN fact, I really want to start the day with the devotions with the kids, and don't know why it feels so hard and not a natural fit. BUT instead of feeling like a lesser mom for it, I'll figure out a way to make it happen that works with out family, instead of being hard on myself for not being you. ; )
Many blessings on you this day!
Your reader, Blessed
Your post is on target for our kids. We have a loosely structured day because if I put too many demands on them or me everything falls apart. We have lots of discussions and therapeutic parenting going on. If I please my heavenly Father then that's all that matters. We, too, limit greatly outside activities.
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